The Cynical Asshole
"Quality" Service Since 1997.
Monday, October 14, 2013
New Feature Added.
For the three fans of mine who want to buy my books, I now have the widgets that lead directly to where they're available! Just look over at the "Buy My Shit!" section to your immediate right and be redirected to my publisher's website.
Sunday, October 13, 2013
New Book Being Written and Update.
Well, well, well. Look who finally decided to update his goddamn blog! Allow me to apologise numerous times for that. School is really making me its bitch at the moment; especially maths. Fuck, I suck in that subject.
Anywho, I just wanted to let you know I haven't died (yet) and that I'll be updating a bit more frequently. So, let's hear some updates:
1. I'm writing my third book and first novella! Details are scarce, but they will be updated as they come. So far I've written three of eleven chapters. It'll be due for release by Christmas, 2013.
2. I have a new show with Blip.tv! It's entitled James and Josh, an animated shitcom (you read that right) about my friend James and myself. Check out the Wikia page: http://james-and-josh.wikia.com/wiki/James_and_Josh_Wiki and the Blip.tv page: blip.tv/jamesandjosh/
There you go, loves! More to come!
Anywho, I just wanted to let you know I haven't died (yet) and that I'll be updating a bit more frequently. So, let's hear some updates:
1. I'm writing my third book and first novella! Details are scarce, but they will be updated as they come. So far I've written three of eleven chapters. It'll be due for release by Christmas, 2013.
2. I have a new show with Blip.tv! It's entitled James and Josh, an animated shitcom (you read that right) about my friend James and myself. Check out the Wikia page: http://james-and-josh.wikia.com/wiki/James_and_Josh_Wiki and the Blip.tv page: blip.tv/jamesandjosh/
There you go, loves! More to come!
Wednesday, July 24, 2013
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
Chasing Amy, the Film I Love the Most...
Chasing Amy is a 1997 romantic drama with comedy laced in-between. It was written and directed by Kevin Smith, most famous for his View Askew films. (Chasing Amy is included in the View Askewniverse, by the way.) The film stars two now-famous actors, Ben Affleck (Who would go on to win two Academy Awards for Good Will Hunting and Argo.) and Jason Lee (Famous for My Name is Earl and Alvin and the Chipmunks 1, 2 & 3) before they hit their respective status as A-list actors. In addition, it stars Joey Lauren Adams (Of Big Daddy, Dazed and Confused and Bio-Dome fame) as the love interest for Ben Affleck. (Coincidentally, Joey Lauren Adams was the real-life girlfriend of Kevin Smith at the time.)
This isn't any regular romantic film, you see. This one set itself apart for a variety of reasons (Ignoring the fact that it has openly homosexual characters.):
1. It was made independently. Originally to cost 1-2 million dollars with a cast consisting of Jon Stewart, David Schwimmer and Drew Barrymore. However, Kevin wanted to keep his cast of Ben, Jason and Joey and so with a budget of only $250,000; he made this flick with complete control.
2. It was only two votes away from an Academy Award nomination. The details aren't specific, but I assume it's safe to say that it would have been for either Best Picture, Best Original Screenplay or Best Supporting Actor for Jason Lee. Mostly because those are the nominations it received from the Spirit Awards. (Winning both Best Original Screenplay and Best Supporting Actor for Jason Lee, respectively.)
3. The titular "Amy" is not a character in the film; it's an expression coined by Silent Bob in his climatic speech near the end of the picture. This is rare for films to use a title that only comes into play at the tail-end of it.
Amy is not your average romantic-drama-comedy; it's far beyond it. It's a serious, interesting and truthful story about love, emotions and dealing with a lover's past. The comedy mainly in the beginning and from there it's scattered in-between the intense scenes to make it not such a morose, dumpy film. Because of the comedy, as well as Kevin Smith's status as a comedic director; this film was unfairly labelled as nothing more than another typical romantic comedy. Which is very, very unfortunate as it truly one of the greatest romances ever committed to cinema. ((500) Days of Summer and The Graduate are very close, though.)
Please go view this film; it's available for instant watch on Netflix and I'm certain you could find it online for free too. This is the most impacting film I have ever watched, and maybe it will be for you too.
This isn't any regular romantic film, you see. This one set itself apart for a variety of reasons (Ignoring the fact that it has openly homosexual characters.):
1. It was made independently. Originally to cost 1-2 million dollars with a cast consisting of Jon Stewart, David Schwimmer and Drew Barrymore. However, Kevin wanted to keep his cast of Ben, Jason and Joey and so with a budget of only $250,000; he made this flick with complete control.
2. It was only two votes away from an Academy Award nomination. The details aren't specific, but I assume it's safe to say that it would have been for either Best Picture, Best Original Screenplay or Best Supporting Actor for Jason Lee. Mostly because those are the nominations it received from the Spirit Awards. (Winning both Best Original Screenplay and Best Supporting Actor for Jason Lee, respectively.)
3. The titular "Amy" is not a character in the film; it's an expression coined by Silent Bob in his climatic speech near the end of the picture. This is rare for films to use a title that only comes into play at the tail-end of it.
Amy is not your average romantic-drama-comedy; it's far beyond it. It's a serious, interesting and truthful story about love, emotions and dealing with a lover's past. The comedy mainly in the beginning and from there it's scattered in-between the intense scenes to make it not such a morose, dumpy film. Because of the comedy, as well as Kevin Smith's status as a comedic director; this film was unfairly labelled as nothing more than another typical romantic comedy. Which is very, very unfortunate as it truly one of the greatest romances ever committed to cinema. ((500) Days of Summer and The Graduate are very close, though.)
Please go view this film; it's available for instant watch on Netflix and I'm certain you could find it online for free too. This is the most impacting film I have ever watched, and maybe it will be for you too.
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Two Quotes From My Good Friend, Terrance.
I literally cannot get over how goddamn funny his quotes were!
In reference to nothing: "I am nigger."
In reference to anal porn: "She's not even struggling! She's taking it like a champ!"
Goddammit, I cannot stop laughing!
In reference to nothing: "I am nigger."
In reference to anal porn: "She's not even struggling! She's taking it like a champ!"
Goddammit, I cannot stop laughing!
Jack Did Strangle Danny; Here's the Proof
As it is always a work in process, I have noticed another implication about Stanley Kubrick's The Shining. Now, I watch this film kind of often now; and believe I have an idea for a moment that occurs in the film.
Do you remember when Jack was throwing the tennis ball at the wall and down the hall? From that, we can certainly imply that it is Jack's ball and it belongs to no one else, right?
Now, later in the flick when Danny is playing with his toys on the rugs; the tennis ball comes rolling toward him and Danny gets up and walks down the hall to room 237, which is open.
Now, a few minutes later we find Jack screaming and Wendy finds that Danny has been strangled (not dead, though) and his sweater torn. She then accuses Jack of doing it following his dream of killing her and their son. Now, he goes and talks to Lloyd the bartender and Wendy shows up to tell him a woman in the hotel did it.
Even when he sees the woman in the room, he comes back and tells Wendy that Danny must've done it to himself.
Now, here's where my idea kicks in.
The marks on Danny's neck and his ripped sweater would be too much for a boy his age to do. He simply couldn't, you see? So, with that; Danny is not responsible for self-harm.
Secondly, the notion of ghosts being real are deliberately played down to being all the nature of cabin fever, right? I think even though Jack is going crazy, he is still sane enough to realise the ghosts aren't real and that's why he tells Wendy there was no woman in room 237 even though he saw one. We never see her again, because she wasn't real and Jack knew it.
Going back to the tennis ball, I believe that Jack was waiting in room 237 for Danny, and so he threw the ball toward him to get his attention and once in the room, he tried to strangle him. Waking up from a 'trance' he realised what he did, told Danny to tell Wendy it was a woman, and he went back to the Colorado Lounge to pretty he was asleep.
Just a very rough idea in process, but it seems plausible, right?
Do you remember when Jack was throwing the tennis ball at the wall and down the hall? From that, we can certainly imply that it is Jack's ball and it belongs to no one else, right?
Now, later in the flick when Danny is playing with his toys on the rugs; the tennis ball comes rolling toward him and Danny gets up and walks down the hall to room 237, which is open.
Now, a few minutes later we find Jack screaming and Wendy finds that Danny has been strangled (not dead, though) and his sweater torn. She then accuses Jack of doing it following his dream of killing her and their son. Now, he goes and talks to Lloyd the bartender and Wendy shows up to tell him a woman in the hotel did it.
Even when he sees the woman in the room, he comes back and tells Wendy that Danny must've done it to himself.
Now, here's where my idea kicks in.
The marks on Danny's neck and his ripped sweater would be too much for a boy his age to do. He simply couldn't, you see? So, with that; Danny is not responsible for self-harm.
Secondly, the notion of ghosts being real are deliberately played down to being all the nature of cabin fever, right? I think even though Jack is going crazy, he is still sane enough to realise the ghosts aren't real and that's why he tells Wendy there was no woman in room 237 even though he saw one. We never see her again, because she wasn't real and Jack knew it.
Going back to the tennis ball, I believe that Jack was waiting in room 237 for Danny, and so he threw the ball toward him to get his attention and once in the room, he tried to strangle him. Waking up from a 'trance' he realised what he did, told Danny to tell Wendy it was a woman, and he went back to the Colorado Lounge to pretty he was asleep.
Just a very rough idea in process, but it seems plausible, right?
Labels:
Asshole,
Cynical,
explanation,
film,
idea,
Stanley Kubrick,
The Shining
Holy Shit, There's Actually Still Good Music?
Goddammit, I've found a song from the past few years (2012, specifically) that I not only like a bit, that I actually really love! I was hella surprised, seeing as how most of the shit we see on today's charts are horrid rap music and shitty teen pop. So, what is the glorious song that I enjoy so well?
My fucking Lennon; if this isn't a way to boost the dying sales of folk rock, I don't know what is! Truly, no lies here; this song may find its way onto my list of all-time favourite songs because of how much it stands out, and how well it was executed.
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