Boy, Do I Hate Insomnia...

"I'm so tired, I haven't slept a wink. I'm so tired, me mind is on the brink. I wonder should I get up; and fix myself a drink? No, no, no."

 - John Lennon, I'm So Tired, The Beatles (The White Album)

How this line describes me oh-so perfectly. I'm such a tired person, especially during the day. But, goddammit, I cannot fall asleep to save my life.

Once I'm asleep, I'm out-cold. Nothing can wake me except for my own body telling me it's satisfied with the number of hours I've given it to rest. But, fuck me, it's so hard to fall asleep! Literally, in spite of how tired I am, I cannot just "go to sleep". How people do this is beyond my comprehension! Jesus H. Christ, what I wouldn't give to have a regular sleeping routine.

Perhaps this is why my dreams are always so odd and bizarre. I deprive my body of its essential sleep for such a duration, that when I do finally allow it a chance to replenish lost energy in a slumber; that my mind decides to get back at me by going deep into my subconscious and dishing out all my worst fears and worst memories at the same time!

Last night, I dreamt that I was moving into a new home. In this very, very large home was ordinary, plain and cream-coloured rooms with nothing in them but beds. (Also cream-coloured.) But then, there was this one room on the first floor of the house which looked something akin to a child's room. It was bright and colourful; and was filled with toys and games! A race-car bed, bright walls, two television sets and a Nintendo 64 console! However, all the objects were broken and I woke up before I could explore the house.

I sure fucking hope I don't dream of such house again tonight.

Sigh.

Alas, I must try once again to sleep; if I am still unsuccessful, I'll be back. Perhaps Paul McCartney can help me drift into a Golden Slumber?

"Golden slumbers fill your eyes! Smiles awake you when you rise! Sleep pretty darling, do not cry; and I will sing a lullaby."

 - Paul McCartney, Golden Slumbers, Abbey Road

So, About My Dream...

I woke up morning after perhaps the most symbolic, strangest and; for reasons unbeknownst to me, most erotic dream of my entire life.

So, in the dream, it began with my school friends and I playing soccer celebrating our last day of high school. (In the dream, we were seniors.) then, after we picked teams and only one person remained (Who is one of my good friends named Pozo.) was left to play as the field.

Have I lost you yet? If not; I will in a minute:

So after playing soccer on Pozo's face for a while; they told us to align on the ground in the shape of a baseball bat. As we did; the Big Boy mascot fell over and most of us escaped just in time. (A few of my fellow comrades, however, did not and likely died a horrible, slow death.) Then, just by fate; the school exploded and I became a firefighter with 62 Truck of Rescue Me.

How about now? No? Well, keep reading:

We weren't like the brave, heroic firefigthters you think of; we were crude, lude and rude. We were looking to get laid (During a fire, mind you.) and we actually almost successful! As we walked (Literally, just slow as fuckin' snails) through the burning school, which, for one reason or another; became a church. Tommy Gavin, his (Deceased) brother Johnny, his cousin Eddie and I began searching the rooms for booze (Keep in mind, I don't drink.)

You sure you're not lost? Okay...:

So, magically we found some. Tommy then proceeded to suck down the entire bottle and we continued on our search for any possible victims as the scenery changed once more to a college dormitory. Whilst searching the rooms; we walked into a girl's room and there we found the rest of our crew. (Franco, Mike, the deceased Lou, Garrity, Black Shawn, Needles and the deceased Jerry.) In the room; they were watching a lesbian porno which was some clever pun based on another film, I can't quite remember...Oh yeah, and everyone in the room was reading transvestite magazines...

Even I'm lost, now:

After that lovely viewing/reading session we all finally remembered what our job was and put out the fire, which now became an orphanage for middle schoolers...with white, jizz-like foam. At this home, we overheard the girls making fun of us and saying we were bad firefighters, so we left, depressed. On our way back to a random-ass house; we discovered that every time we put our hats on; it made a fire truck sound...

And then I woke up.