I'm Thinking About Going to 'AA'...

...Not 'Alcoholic's Anonymous', shit-for-brains; I'm talking about the newly-formed 'Asshole's Anonymous'!

Never heard of it? Neither have I, so that's why I thought I should found it. Similar to the other AA and it's slightly-worse brother, NA (Narcotic's Anonymous), it has twelve steps. Which I shall go over...now:

Step 1 - We admitted we were fucking assholes; we were powerless and full of great douchebaggery. Goddamn, did we suck.

Step 2 - We believe that the flying spaghetti monster has intervened and set us down the path to recovery.

Step 3 - We made an 'informed' decision to let the flying spaghetti monster into our hearts and let him take over...I mean, I can't to be blame for my douchebaggery; it was obvious that the flying spaghetti monster needed me to fuck up so I could...not be a fuck up...wait...

Step 4 - We looked deep inside ourselves to find good morals and hope...All I found was blood, guts and bones...I need a fucking map.

Step 5 - We admitted to the flying spaghetti monsters that we suck and he's number one.

Step 6 - We're pretty goddamn ready to stop being a bunch of cunts.

Step 7 - More of the same fucking shit of the last six; I think we really got ahead of ourselves with the number of these fucking steps...

Step 8 - We made a list of all the people we've offended; and swiftly told those bastards to: "eat me".

Step 9 - The exact same fucking thing as step eight...fuck the person who wrote this list...oh wait...

Step 10 - MORE OF THE SAME GODDAMN SHIT.

Step 11 - EVEN MORE OF THE SAME FUCKING SHIT.

Step 12 - TAKE A FUCKING GUESS. FUCK THIS, I'M STILL AN ASSHOLE! AND I'M GODDAMNED PROUD!

...Ahem...maybe this whole idea of 'Asshole's Anonymous' wasn't such a great idea...